When it comes to working with our teen girls, it’s all about balance. Balancing the fact that they want to be adults and are maturing in a lot of ways, and that they are still girls who need chances to choose, learn, and be silly. Take a look at what teen girls need and think about how you can balance this in your troop.

Teen girl want you to:

• Accept them for who they are.
• Respect their need for space.
• Respect their need for privacy.
• Accept their right to their own opinion.
• Accept their right to have a say.
• Understand that their “self” as an individual is not the same as their “self” when part of a group.

Teen girls want:

• Opportunities to learn skills – anything that increases their sense of mastery, proficiency, or the ability to “hold their own” in the adult world.
• Activities that are social.
• Activities that are separate for “little girls” – even teens who like working with younger girls need time with their peers.
• Activities that allow them to demonstrate their know-how.
• Opportunities to joke around with an admired adult (as long as the fun is not at their expense).
• Food.
• A sense of choice.
• A chance to save face.
• A chance to contribute.
• Fair feedback – without humiliation or embarrassment.
• Reassurance without feeling childish.
• Milestones and privileges that come with being older.

During confrontations, teen girls want:

• A chance to talk without interruption.
• To feel heard, that their position was truly considered.
• To avoid “traps” and “bait”.
• To prove that they have control over themselves, that you can’t make them.
• Opportunities to “repair” mistakes.

What tips and tactics have you tried that help teen girls thrive?